there is a place i'd rather go

it is a place of kinder understanding
a place of better balance
a place of truth and purity
a place called
home

Close but not quite

and i know ...
never again
will i work so hard for
"close, but not quite"
i hope i will not be
too weak..
to see...to know...
to be alone
for as long as it takes
to find you

i hope my eyes and heart will be open to see you
i hope chance favors me
and finally~ the joy of belonging

An Empty Spot

...or two

will you love me as much as i would love you
will you see me and will you ever get to know me
will you show me
will you hold my hand
will you show me your world
not just sometimes..
or once in awhile...
will you want me there, because the togetherness feels better
because you would not want it any other way

will i be more than a sunny time friend
someone to play a part
will i be the one
you love to be with

will you fill that empty spot ....or two
in my soul...
will i find a place ...my place ...
with you

Believing

Believing in myself
takes effort
every day

Have you ever woken up one day
in a metaphorical way~
the place you thought you had made it to...
was not quite where you were after all

it takes effort to look and see it still off in the distance..
still possible..
how far? how far, now...
have i been walking towards it?..
have all the efforts and emotions been moving me along
or
~ have i been standing still
has time been lost..days gone by ...searching in the wrong place...growing some only to have small droughts and storms take most of it away...

i have to believe i've made progress, though it sometimes feels like
starting over...square one..
now~
will it be as difficult?..
how long will it take?
to get where i thought i had already gotten to

please be easier this time, i think..
show me the way, i say to myself
and i know that i understand..
i had never fully deceived myself
well, not for very long anyway

oh how i am tempted to not show myself
to not be myself
to change myself
to feel badly for myself
to stop believing

that i can make a difference in some things in life..
maybe some things are out of our control...
so much chance involved...
so i think, stop working so hard..
resolve to take it easy ...
just be myself
and still
Believe

wishing

The day is done, may kind night spread
Her gentle wings o'er heart and head.
Rest for my body, peace of mind,
In sleep's calm haven I will find.
Bright dreams will come to welcome me
Into the land of memory.
Then shall to-morrow's love bring light
After the dark of this good night.

--Anonymous

Courting Courage ....Friends Inspire

"There is in every true woman's heart, a spark of heavenly fire, which lies dormant in the broad
daylight of prosperity, but which kindles up and burns and blazes in the dark hour of adversity"--Washington Irving

"You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face......"--E. Roosevelt

"The things you fear undefeatable, not by their nature, but by your approach"--Jewel

"The solution lies in the awakening of the soul because our soul is really the source of knowledge.
To find our soul is to find everything and find God"--Sant Thakar Singh (who I see is ?maybe controversial...but I like his quote)

Storms
Margie DeMerelle

There will be storms, child
There will be storms
And with each tempest
You will seem to stand alone
Against cruel winds

But with time the rage and fury
Shall subside
And when the sky clears
You will find yourself
Clinging to someone
You would have never known
But for storms

And so much on my mind
"Everybody today seems to be in such a terrible rush;
anxious for greater developments and greater
wishes and so on; so that children have very little time for parents;
parents have very little time for each other;
and the home begins the disruption of the peace of the world"-Mother Teresa

Call to healing

Physician heal thy self
Mother, sister, father, brother, partner, lover, friend
grandmother, grandfather, uncle, aunt, cousin
stranger
heal thy self

Do not live with the splinter deep beneath a hard calus that has formed there over time...
You can walk fine.?..no pain you say...
as long as you walk just so...keep the status quo...

heal thy self

For if you try to run one day....you will see that something is wrong...
Oh yes, running is not for you...
you could never run that fast anyway, you say...

and so you hobble along....
now and then ..the desire to run...
eventually the desire is gone...

did you once desire to run....
a dream a long time ago...
never real?....do you know?

I call to you from a distance...it is but a whisper...barely audible...what?

heal thy self (whispered)